Media personality and actress Toke Makinwa has waded into the ongoing conversation around marriage timing for women, declaring on her podcast that the twenties are the wrong decade for women to walk down the aisle, a view she says is rooted in her own lived experience.
Speaking on a recent episode of her podcast, Toke Moments, alongside guest and reality star Tacha, Makinwa argued that most women in their twenties simply haven’t developed the self-awareness needed to make sound, lasting decisions about who they marry.
“Women have no business getting married in their 20s… You don’t even know yourself yet. Those who did are regretting it now,” she said, adding a pointed jab that even women who remain married from that era would, if being honest, admit the timing was a mistake.
The remarks weren’t purely theoretical. Makinwa has been candid in recent months about her own struggles during that period of her life, revealing that at that age, she didn’t know herself, and she pointed out how people who married that young are regretting it now.
She went further, reflecting on the years that followed, describing her thirties, not her twenties, as the more difficult stretch of her adult life, and admitting she wishes she had used her twenties to explore more rather than commit to one relationship for the bulk of that decade.
Her comments echo similar reflections she has made on other platforms in the past, where she has urged younger women to “figure themselves out” before rushing into marriage in their early or mid-twenties, suggesting this isn’t a one-off opinion but a theme she returns to often when discussing her own journey, including her high-profile marriage to Maje Ayida, which ended in divorce in 2017 on grounds of adultery.
Tacha, for her part, offered a lighter but no less pointed observation on the institution of marriage itself, invoking her mother’s outlook on the subject: “My mom says marriage is like an institution. Those inside want to get out; those outside can’t wait to get in.”
The exchange is likely to stir familiar debate on Nigerian social media, where Makinwa’s relationship commentary, from her views on financial expectations in dating to now this take on marital timing, routinely draws sharply divided reactions, with some praising her candor and others pushing back against generalizing personal experience into universal advice.
WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW
Toke Makinwa’s message boils down to one core idea: self-discovery should come before marriage, not after.
Drawing from her own experience of marrying young and later divorcing, she argues that many women in their 20s haven’t yet developed the clarity or self-awareness needed to choose a life partner wisely, and that rushing into marriage at that stage often leads to regret later on.
Her comments are less a blanket rule and more a personal cautionary lesson: know yourself first, then commit.
